Every year just about everyone you know is making a New Year’s Resolution. Whether it’s to get to the gym, eat healthier or to quit that nagging habit, I think the tradition of the resolution has hit us all. Right about now, 90% of you reading this are probably rolling your eyes. Yes, I realize that it’s the same thing year after year. Promises of getting better, being better, doing better come January 1st and yet by the time we reach February 1st we’re still the same old people we were two months ago—what gives?!
According to the New York Post, about 80% of resolutioners fail within the first month of trying—many failing their resolutions within the first TWELVE days of the new year. With a success rate that low, you’d think that we’d be trying to give away Samsung Galaxies at an Apple Store grand opening. All jokes aside, why do we start the year off with so much hope, and where does it all go wrong? What can we do to fix it? Are we just lazy? Why should we even bother?
Some researches chalk the resolution failure rate up to unrealistic expectations. If you’re anything like me, I know that I am very excited by the concept of a fresh start. Whether it’s starting a new planner (Hello 2019!), opening a fresh pack of pens and taking that little nib of wax off of the point, or something as simple as pulling out the first, crisp tissue from the newly opened box, a fresh start energizes me. It makes me feel as though I have accomplished something (using the last tissue), and that I have an opportunity to create that which I desire with whatever it is that I’m beginning.
When it comes to resolutions, the unrealistic expectations are no exception for me. Admittedly, I am in that 80% that has failed their New Year’s resolution by day twelve. Perhaps it may have something to do with the fact that I want to lose 27 pounds, quit drinking coffee (okay, maybe just take it down to a cup or two a day), exercise daily, journal daily, scrub the floors at least weekly, pay off $30,000 in credit card debt, make new friends, learn to crochet and become a world-famous blogger. While all of these goals are all excellent ways to enrich my life, and are all things I think would help me to be the person I strive to be, I got tired just reading my run-on sentences. I’m already about 17% failed for those resolutions and I haven’t even started them yet.
So, what do I do about my resolutions? Do I resign myself to the fact that resolutions fail for just about everyone, so why bother? Or do I forge on with my child-like optimism? How else am I going to become the person that I want to be if I don’t set goals for myself? I mean, it -is- the New Year, this is my chance to change. This is it! Or is it?
Yes, it is the New Year. Yes, this is a chance for change. But this isn’t the only chance for change. This isn’t the only time that I can work towards becoming the person I want to be and accomplishing the goals I have for myself. Perhaps I can step back, learn from the research, and reformulate my plan. My goals are a little overwhelming, especially for the person who barely has time to shower daily let alone blog, journal, exfoliate, pray, exercise and pay down debt daily. But what about taking my over-arching goals and breaking them down into smaller steps? It is the sage wisdom that I share with my son when he’s faced with a task that seems overwhelming to him. When you’re staring at the messy room that is your life (or goals, or resolutions) break them down into smaller parts. As you accomplish the smaller tasks you begin to feel good about yourself, which will encourage you to do more. Before you know it, your Dad stops nagging you to clean you room because you combined all of the smaller tasks (put away laundry, clean up toys, clear off desk, etc.) to accomplish the larger goal. The same works for us. Break your resolutions up into smaller, more measurable goals.
Once your goals are smaller, they’re easier to measure. It’s easier to tell when you’ve made progress if you have a way to gauge what you’ve done. You want to pay off $30,000 in credit card debt? Okay, great! Start by paying off $6,000 this year. Break that down into quarters, for $1,500 every four months. That means you can check in in May to see if you’ve paid down that $1,500 ($375/month for four months). Doesn’t paying down $375/month of your debt seem much more attainable than $30,000? It’s a lot more realistic, too. Sure, you may not pay your $30,000 off in one year, but when you strategically address that resolution you’re more likely to keep it than the opposite (i.e. spending more, or collecting more interest).
I see New Year’s Resolutions as a time to think big. Please don’t allow my practicality to dissuade you from your giant dreams—by all means, please don’t stop dreaming big! But perhaps approach those big dreams with a step-by-step approach. New Year’s Resolutions can last an entire year if you let them. Any good plan requires lots of checking in and reassessing. Maybe this year you can set check-in points for each of your larger resolutions, and be flexible enough to change course if needed. One of my favorite quotes says that, “People don’t fail plans, plans fail people” and this couldn’t be more apropos to the success rate of New Year’s Resolutions. If you’re not making your resolutions, don’t be afraid to tweak them so that you can. You’re not failing the resolution; the resolution is failing you. This year I challenge you to make resolutions that work for you! I’d rather see you accomplish many smaller goals than feel as though you’ve accomplished nothing at all!
